On the Eve of Election

With all of the political ads on the television of late, it's getting more and more difficult to forget that there's an election tomorrow. Nevertheless, these ads got me thinking: if I were running for office, what would I need to do to get elected (other than "silencing" the scores of arms dealers I have illegally dealt with in my brief tenure as gunrunner* for various juntas down South America way)?

These are my ideas for how I would run my campaign:

1) My slogan (and platform) would be: "Vote for AC -- He'd Vote for You!"

2) I would purchase ads on bus stop benches that just had my smiling face. I might also include a website address, but that site would have little to do with the campaign (such as iamawesome.com).

3) I would change my last name to something difficult to spell, and then run as a write-in candidate in Alaska.**

4) I would move to Alaska.

5) I would win. Boom.

*Oddly enough, this is also an elected office.
**I wrote myself in as my vote for President in 2004. True story. I did not win.