In the past two months I have purchased:
1) Running shoes,
2) A watch that measures heart rate and distance,
3) The book "Running for Dummies,"
4) A subscription to Runner's World.
In the past two months, I have gone on substantive runs:
zero times. I have gone on very short runs once or twice, but nothing more than five minutes or so.
Though I am keeping my fingers crossed that my growing head knowledge of running will make me wake up one day with the body of a gazelle*, so far, this has not come to fruition. But, thanks to articles as specific as one on how to tie one's shoes**, I feel that soon I will have the body of a god***.
However, I have decided that tomorrow morning is the time that I begin. I practiced this morning by getting up slightly earlier than I normally would have, and I have earned a smug sense of satisfaction that allows me to look at others and scoff and I think to myself, "Did you get up slightly earlier than normal and consider it practicing for running? I didn't think so."
While I will still be taking a short run, I consider this one up from the very short runs to which I have become accustomed. I'll let you know if anything notable happens****.
* I would like to have the swiftness of a gazelle. I would neither like to wake up a centaur-type creature nor with a headless gazelle's body in my bed as some sort of mafia message.
*** Currently, I'm working with Chinese restaurant Buddha. Long-term, I'd like to lean more towards ascetic Buddha, though I would like to stop well short of being able to see the outline of my spine while looking at my stomach.
**** Honestly, part of my aversion to running is that people passing in cars really like to throw things at me. On at least two of the times I have gone out with friends, people driving by have thrown reasonably full cups of soda. On one instance, I think they threw an apple. Fortunately for me, their aim was poor, but it's a bit disheartening to know that I appear to be a waste receptacle for the discriminating person on the go.
5 hours ago