Interruption of List: Random Lunch Hour Happenings

I walked over to the bank to make a deposit, and on my way out of the bank, there was a man who was about seventy-five year old caucasian male who was about to walk in. So, as is my habit, I held the door for him, and as he approached, he said,

"It's all right, G, I've got it."

To this, I wanted to reply, "Ain't no big thang, P-Money, I gots ya' back." However, I could only assume that this reply would not be received in the spirit in which it was meant, and so I just walked on.

As I was walking, I passed by an eye glass store, and I glanced at the advertisements in the window, and on one of them, there was a woman wearing glasses who had an un-buttoned business coat on with only a bra underneath. Now, since underwear and glasses go together like peanut butter and jelly or Forrest Gump and Jenny, this made me think that the advertisers had assumed that my reaction would be like this:

When in actuality, it was more like:

Be sure to tune in on Monday for part three of the list. I maybe would have posted over the weekend, but I think the gf has something in store for my birthday, which is apparently to be celebrated tomorrow, but is not actually until Monday.

I'm a little concerned about it, to be honest. She keeps asking me these weird questions like, "If you could do anything over the weekend, what would you do?" and "Just how much heroin do you think that you could take before you overdosed?" I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens.