I have decided that I am going to become a large part of the Catholic faith, and this is why.
I believe that every time that I have gone to a Padres game, the Padres have lost. This has occurred multiple times. If you're like my friend Red Riding Hood, you would claim that I just don't go to enough games, and while that may or may not be true, I prefer to think about it in terms of the nearly miraculous ways the Padres manage to lose when I go see them.
Take yesterday's game for example. The Padres were leading 5-4 in the top of the ninth. All that they had to do was to get three outs, and the game was theirs. They even brought in their best closing pitcher, Trevor Hoffman, for the task. Even with all of this in their favor, the Phillies got two runs, and went on to win the game.
I declare this to be at least my third miracle. I would like to submit myself for canonization to the Catholic church as the patron saint for all teams that are not the Padres (which is kinda funny in and of itself as the Padres have the most "religious" name in baseball).
You may use this as my icon:
9 hours ago