Monday, June 12, 2006

This Is Possibly Not Needed

But I thought that brown and black didn't go together?

Poop joke for the day? Check.

In other news, I had the opportunity to go to the Happiest Place on Earth (which I am legally obligated to capitalize) on Saturday. It was a wonderful opportunity to hang out and be with people that I enjoy hanging out with and being with.

However, I was reminded of something that troubles me about that place. As nearly everyone knows about Disneyland, the park is separated into various "lands" that have different attractions and themes. There is "Tomorrow Land" and "Frontier Land" as well as several others, but the one that I would like to speak about today is "Fantasy Land."

First off, let's just say that "Fantasy Land" is a misnomer, at least for me. There is nary a place in this whole section of the park where I can pretend that I have won the Heisman Trophy, which is my fantasy.

Secondly, there is a ride called "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" which is based on the Disney cartoon, The Wind and the Willows. As you may have guessed, the ride involves Mr. Toad taking a wild ride, which includes riding through a library, a bar, and a room full of explosives. Eventually, Mr. Toad makes the tragic mistake of getting hit by a train, which I imagine is pretty traumatizing for the little kid that "Fantasy Land" is meant to pander to.

However, the real therapist-bill-inducer begins after the collision. You see, unfortunately for Mr. Toad, he winds up in Hell, which is honestly a scary place, even at Disneyland. The picture below that I found online doesn't even do the place justice.

It should be noted that before you see the cartoony devils above, you enter through the mouth of a huge scary dragon's head, and there is at least one more horrifying dragon that you must pass to exit, as well as a wicked looking judge in a red judge's outfit.

The gf just reminded me to add about this part of the ride that it is quite a bit hotter than the rest of the ride. So, not only are you riding past devils, dragons, and demonic judges (alliteration, anyone?), you are also experiencing the heat.

I'm just saying, maybe this isn't appropriate for kids, as it nearly makes me poop my pants.

Poop Joke Number 2 (And 3) for the day? Check and mate.

If you all don't believe me, give this ride a shot next time you go; it will put the fear of God in you.

1 comment:

Red Riding Hood said...

That ride is just wrong.